There are two simple ways to reduce: diet and exercise. In the first case the object is to starve without making yourself hungry. The following menu has been prepared by an expert at figures.
Breakfast
The juice of two door knobs
One cup of evaporated coffee
Two pieces of toasted corn flakes
Dinner
One tomato soup bone
Fried fish scales
Potato greens
Creamed duck feathers
Slice cucumber seeds
Supper
Two hard-boiled egg shells
The whites of two eyes
Sawdust with pigeon milk
A few simple exercises taken three times an hour will help to remove much superfluous fat. The following have been recommended by an ex-convict:
1. Lying on your back on the floor, jump up and touch the ceiling 29 times. (The success attendant upon this exercise depends entirely upon not letting the feet touch the floor at any time.)
2. Lift your left foot about a foot from the floor. Grasp the piano firmly in your right hand, raise it above your head 13 times.
3. Standing on your head, place your hands on your hips and take a deep breath. Repeat until the hips have been completely removed.
In a couple of days, following these directions, you should be reduced to a scrap heap.
From page 5 of The Smithfield Herald, Tuesday morning, Oct. 20, 1925
newspapers.digitalnc.org/lccn/sn92073982/1925-10-20/ed-1/seq-5/
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