Neighborhood Comment
A few years ago the Pages built a magnificent memorial
church at Aberdeen. The best of material was used in its construction, the roof
being covered with copper shingles, and it has been since the pride of the
community. But now it is almost roofless, and the wealthy Pages will have to
pass out a little more coin for a new one. It won’t be a copper roof, either,
though there is no doubt that it is the best roofing material made. Copper is
in too much demand for moonshining purposes these days to be exposed even on
the roof of a church, for that’s the demand which the first roof went to fill.
Capt. W.L. Howie is our authority. He was in Aberdeen the day after the
moonshiners stole half of the roof. That’s even worse than the sin of that old
darkey who used to store liquor, which he kept for sale in the basement of the
Monroe Baptist Church.
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Messrs. Lee and Crawford Griffin, when they conducted a
sales stable in Wadesboro years ago, had to contend with a certain inveterate
loafer. This man, running true to his tribe, had another besetting sin. He
imbibed too freely and too often of the flowing bowl. This sin also made him an
added burden on the Griffin brothers because he always chose their stables in
which to sleep off the effects of the spree.
Their patience exhausted, the Messrs. Griffin began to tax
their ingenuity to rid themselves of the loafer, who often disturbed them in
their trading by his lusty snoring. Hints or reprimands intended to impress the
man with the undesirability of his presence had not the least effect. To all
intents he was a parasite contended with all his days.
It happened that a furniture store in Wadesboro rented some
vacant space in the Griffin brothers’ stable to store its surplus goods. One
day when the store unloaded some coffins in this space the Messrs. Griffin
conceived of a plan that eventually rid the place of their parasite. The next
time this old man staggered to the barn to sleep off his booze they immediately
got into action. Selecting a nice, glass-plated coffin from the furniture
stock, they placed the now unconscious man in it. The folded his hands, first
placing n them a bouquet of flowers; put a coin over each eye, and scattering
flowers all about his body, closed the lid.
Two hours later, from a point of vantage, they watched the
terrible awakening. The first sign of returning consciousness was when the man
began to flutter his right eye-lid. The coin swung in the balance, hesitated a
little, then fell. A dazed look spread over the man’s face. As yet he could not
grasp the meaning of his surroundings. The left eye began to move a little, and
the other coin went the way of the first. The scent from the flowers woved the
old fellow to glance in the direction of his hands, which still held the
bouquet. His predicament began to dawn upon him. Glancing upward he managed
through the rays of light that fell downward, to learn without a doubt that he
was housed in a coffin. An agonized scream rent the air, and a sound of falling
glass was heard as the man dived upward throught he glass front of the coffin.
Neither did he hesitate on reaching the floor; but he went out the door, and he
was never seen again back at the stables.
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